Friday, December 11, 2009

letters i wish i could send....

Dear EX-gf of my beloved:

Let's face the fact that your relationship has been over, done, exhausted, kaput....for at least 2 yrs or more. Let's face the fact that you've been EX's for over 1 year now.

Get the Fuck over it!

I'm sorry if I'm sounding too harsh on this but the reality is you had almost 6 fucking years to get your sorry-ass shit together, smarten up, appreciate what you had in Her and make some fucking serious changes to, at the least, meet Her half way on your commitment and all that comes with that.

Take a long hard look at NEED professional help in getting over your issues...past and present. Otherwise, your future, dear girl, looks awfully fucking grim.

You cannot expect to get through life on your own and enjoy the benefits of a healthy relationship until YOU get your shit together, deal with your issues and your constant depressive state of mind. How dare I say this?? Been the fuck there and fucking done it not too many years ago myself - stood at the precipice of doom looking to jump far too often. Ta-Da! IIIII got my shit together BEFORE She came into my life.

But here's the eye opener, one can do this for you...YOU have to take the initiative and the steps to get healthier and make the best of YOU you can be.

Don't be sending fucking stupid guilt-trip emails about how you've cried for 3 fucking days after the news She shared with you or how She's torn your heart out...fuck, you don't think you've put Her through enough in your years together?? You don't think you've sponged off of Her far-too-giving soul enough then and still now??? HELLO! Reason She's financially fucking strapped now and you STILL continue to keep shit that belongs to Her.

Reality check: get off your ass and get on with your own life. Stop expecting others to make life better for you. Stop expecting others to take care of you and pay the way for you. Stop expecting Her to come back to you. IT AIN'T FUCKING HAPPENIN'.

With Heartfelt Emotions,
The Replacement

Dear EX-gf of Mine:

So, here we are, several months after the day I told you I could no longer deal with all the shit that was destroying our 3 yrs together.

Let's remember who it was who INSISTED and whined about how important it was to "her" to keep in contact and stay friends.

Let's remember who tried her best to accommodate this request but found that stalking me by texts, emails and calls to my work were so fucking annoying, I totally lost it with you.

Let's remember who sent back all of your personal, precious goodies but where the fuck is my stuff???

You send me emails, at work, letting me know that sad stuff is happening in your family again. You know, in my heart, my most sincere best wishes will always be with that situation which I wrote back to you. You have, weeks and weeks later, never bothered to respond or keep me up to date as I requested.

You, bluntly, have not communicated in any form whatsoever so now I give up. I can only assume that like the EX of my now gf, you can't handle She and I being together which wouldn't surprise me because all you did throughout our relationship is trash Her and Our friendship.
NEWSFLASH: whether you believe it or not, NOTHING ever went on between Her and I other than a great solid friendship. I never looked at Her in a romantic way until just a few short months ago.
NEWSFLASH: I've NEVER been unfaithful to you and never even considered it with anyone you were suspicious of, including M, even though you rudely and blatantly didn't even bother to ask me to join you (2 yrs into our relationship), your friends and your sister on a trip to the U.S. for your special-year birthday...remember that??? Uh, yeah. How the fuck do you think that made me feel??

And remember the time you bought tickets and went off to a concert with your friends rather than spending the weekend with me celebrating OUR anniversary??? NO! The weekend AFTER our anniversary date was not an acceptable choice.

Do you also remember the time I was so emotionally upset and you promised to come over to try to calm me down and spend time with me only to TEXT me about an hr later to tell me you weren't coming over but were going to spend the WEEKEND with your friend because her dad was in the hospital??? WTF? I wasn't important enough, even then, to take an hour or two out of an entire weekend just to be with me.

Time and time again, you proved to me that FRIENDS always took priority over me or our relationship or events when we SHOULD have been together.

3 years of constantly standing OUTSIDE of the circle of your life, remaining on the back burner only to have you pull me to the front at YOUR convenience. It was finally too much to continue with.

Let me also remind you, dear one, that, although I was far from the perfect mate for you, I tried my damnest for 3 yrs to get you to come around, come out, reveal your true identity or have you decided to stay bisexual??? I tried to be a part of your life circle with your friends and family but, fuck, you seem to take on a different personality with each group of people in your life. I swear I was in love with fucking Sybil or Three Faces of Eve. And WTF is with the southern drawl when your chatting up a 2 hr storm with your dude-friend out west while I had taken my precious time to drive, for almost an hour, to your place, bring you homecooked food and spend time with you during your recuperation???

Please remember that when you're in a relationship with someone as much older to you as I am, a serious level of maturity needs to be there. Whenever I spent time with you and your friends or whenever I listened to the 'way' you talk on the phone with them, I could never understand how women of your age and theirs could be so damn immature.

Another NEWSFLASH: bedroom talk to me in a baby voice IS NOT A FUCKING TURN ON! and again, talking with a southern drawl accent, especially AFTER I've asked you stop several times, IS NOT A FUCKING TURN ON! And then you wondered why I left the bed???

I had hoped that letting you go would encourage you to seek your own life outside of your parent's home, would encourage you to find your own identity rather then be what your friends and family want you to be, would encourage you to be more independent and grow within yourself, the person who I know has a good heart and good soul but really has a lot of growing up to do. The 30's are here, dear friend. Time to be a tiny bit more serious about certain things and time to set your priorities correctly if you really do want to be in a healthy relationship.

All the best,
The EX.

more enlightening stuff ;-)

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